You know how the story goes—a sudden burst of inspiration and you have never been more ready to pursue your dreams. You are going to go for the big one and nothing will hold you back. But then you share your plans with your friends and loved ones and the reaction is lukewarm or even in opposition. This can’t be right. They are supposed to be cheering you on!
When this happens, just pull all of your attention back from the other people in your life. When we care so deeply, perhaps too deeply, about the impact our decisions and actions have on others, it is too easy to lose sight of our own journey.
From this place, now take time to reflect on the changes you are going through. Take a deep breath and tune into your feelings. What are you experiencing right now? Do you feel excited, inspired or free? Do you feel driven, tired or that you are efforting? Find your own words, but know that the distinction is important. If our feelings fall into the first category, lets call it “uplifted”, then you are right on track. You are moving with your flow and being supported along the way. I’d say, keep doing what you are doing. When you are taking inspired action from a place of alignment, you can guarantee that it will work out beautifully.
If your feelings fall into the second category, let’s call that “struggle”, then it’s likely you are going against the flow. And when you try to push the river, it will feel like hard work. Often it’s not that we feel one way or the other but more that we have a mixed vibe. We can feel uplifted one minute and struggle the next, but the good news is that in either of these situations, the solution is the same.
Take some time to ask yourself what fears you are holding? If you are struggling, they will be there, we just need to find them. Our fear gremlins are masters of disguise and will have cunning ways of leading you off track. For example, fear can manifest mentally as limiting beliefs (What I am or am not capable of), emotionally as rebound emotions (perhaps anger or boredom), or even physically (as illness or accidents). So what fears do you have about this situation? Meditate on this question and see what bubbles up for you. When these fear gremlins reveal themselves to you, treat them like little messengers who have come to help you on your path. The trouble with fear is that most of us want it to just disappear so we try to run from it or avoid it. But fear is our own creation. At some point in our lives, when we were feeling threatened or scared, we employed a gremlin and assigned them the role of letting us know any time a similar situation cropped up. So this fear gremlin has been faithfully doing as we requested, yet we have been doing everything we can to ignore the messages. Instead, turn to greet any fear gremlins and welcome them with open arms. Ask them for their message and soothe their concerns. Find ways to make peace with any fear by gently challenging the concept. Whatever you notice, ask “is it true? Can I know that this will or won’t happen?” The answer will always be “no”!
Now you may be thinking “what about the other people in my life, how do I get them onside?“ Here is the best bit. As you embrace your fear gremlins and send them love, the situation and relationships will magically transform. That’s right, you don’t need to do a thing! Why? Because the stuff on the outside was only ever a mirror for you inner world anyway! Those people or experiences that have been getting in the way were simply reflecting the parts of you that weren’t yet in complete alignment. It’s what Gill Edwards called “The Discouragement Committee”. These wonderful people were just a manifestation of any inner turmoil, checking in to ensure every aspect of YOU was onside! Ever notice that in convincing someone else that you know what you are doing, you find the person who needs the most convincing is really you? Otherwise, you would simply nod, thank them and move on!
As you take care of all of you, loving your fears and reassuring those aspects inside that may not quite be lined up yet, things will all fall into place. Then you realise, it was only ever about you in the first place. The Universe is always on your side!
By Tiffany Kay
Tiffany Kay is a transformational coach, inspirational speaker and the creator of Living an Inspired Life. After flat-lining through the early part of her life, Tiffany faced a challenging and transformational time of awakening. Following her son’s open-heart surgery, she realised that life matters and made a deliberate and conscious decision to make her life a life that counted. Since then she has been inspiring others to discover the truth of who they are!
Tiffany runs a coaching programme called “Your Life Two” that helps women to turn crises and transitions into awakenings – to design and sculpt an inspired life and to find the happiness they truly deserve.
Tiffany is also the author of “JoyScope” – a book and blog offering daily inspirations to nourish the heart and soul.